Online Dating

Amy Lee Johnson
376
25 7

Wedding shower gifts can be as unique as the recipient. The shower organizer should consider the personality, style and interests of the bride when planning the party. With a wedding shower theme that fits the unique qualities of the bride, shower guests will be prompted to use their imaginations to brainstorm creative gift ideas.
Love of the Outdoors
For the outdoorsy bride-to-be, organize an adventurous shower activity such as mountain biking, rock climbing or camping. Unique wedding shower gifts could include items such as a cozy tent, a sleeping bag for two, and a book on romantic outdoor getaways.
Culinary Gifts
If the bride lacks confidence in her cooking skills, why not organize her shower around a culinary theme. The shower activity may include a cooking demonstration or wine tasting event. All attendees would be asked to bring three of their favorite personal recipes, written on cards; the cards would then be presented to the bride in a special recipe box or book. Guests could bring shower gifts such as live herb-garden starts, a serving tray for breakfast in bed or a picnic basket for two.
New Homeowner Gifts
For the couple about to move into their first home, organize a home improvement shower. Gifts could include tool sets, books on household repairs or decorating tips, and lawn tools such as rakes, hoes and leaf blowers.
Honeymoon Gifts
Is the couple about to embark on a tropical honeymoon? Organize a luau shower, with leis, grass-skirted tables and inflatable palm trees. Shower gifts might include scuba lessons, snorkeling equipment, his and hers beach towels, or a gift certificate for a couples massage at their honeymoon resort.
Artistic Gifts
Don’t leave the happy couple staring at blank walls. Organize a shower where each guest brings a piece of art to decorate the newlywed home. The gifts do not necessarily need to be expensive; guests can acquire unique items from local Saturday markets or craft fairs. Shower guests may even wish to contribute a special painting or framed photograph of their own creation. Along with filling their home, the wedding shower gifts will hold special significance to the newlyweds as it will remind them of close friends and family members.

Nora Femenia
695
25 7

How can you pursue this relationship without being hurt? Here is a short list of indicators to keep you aware of what is going on:
1.- The hidden anger aspect:
They carry a lot of repressed anger from their childhood, now projected on the people around them. It appears as sarcastic comments, derisive opinions and blaming other people.
Please, look at the annoying behavior as “behavior done with an impact on me”. Recognize your emotions: is it anger? or disappointment? and remain calm and poised. Control your own breathing. Don’t let him get the best of you. PA people begin to win when the shouting starts and you become defensive and angry at their inconsiderate behavior.
Instead, describe his behavior, and then talk about how it creates a problem. For instance, you might say, “When we are discussing something and you make a sarcastic remark, it blocks the conversation and then I’m not able to tell you what you’re really asking. It would be helpful to me if you would tell me directly what you’re thinking and feeling. That way, I can respond and perhaps we can even make things better.”
It’s very important to become aware of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors provoked by the reticent silence of passive aggression. Even if you ask for direct talk, you still could get denial of your request. Refusing to talk clearly with you plays a part in passive aggression, so you need to expect some degree of silence about his real intentions behind the sneaky comments said, or his procrastinating behavior.
2.- The Insecurity aspect
How can you manage this behavior? It appears as manipulation, describing things differently according to the recipient, backstabbing and in general not owning the problematic behavior. PA persons feel that they are the victims, and that their behavior is rational because it is done in self-defense. Confronting this behavior in a firm but caring way, with some proof (perhaps keeping a journal of what was promised or said to you) is necessary.
3.- The Failure of Appreciation aspect, which makes very difficult for them to see life as a “half full glass” proposition. If there is a way to describe their situation as negative, they will exploit every part of reality able to be construed as a miserable situation. They love piling up misery after misery, rejection after rejection! Positive aspects will be thoroughly ignored or rejected. Of course, their misery is never their fault, and probably you or someone else needs to be blamed….
You need to be sure of what are your own accomplishments, and be proud of them, before they are diminished by the “misery framing.” Find a way of reminding yourself of how good you are, before it’s too late and you begin to accept the misery framing. Always remember not to let this person steal your joy and make you believe you are not a good person, only because he feels miserable. Stay focused on the things that matter to you the most, and give up the pretense of being able to solve his problems.
4.- The Fear of Life aspect, that goes hand on hand with a general lack of trust on others. PA persons resist getting near of others because assuming that others are not worthy of trust, thus behaving with suspicion, which makes other people act with prevention, which in turn fulfills the prophecy. As a result, other people (including you) are less deserving of love and appreciation, don’t deserve respect and can be ignored.
You need to deal with this aspect by generating your own circle of friends or relatives, who will confirm what you believe is true. Be persistent in taking care of what you value, so you can receive confirmation from your own trusted sources of appreciation.
The Basic Rule of Survival:
Don’t expect or want anything important, fundamental, or vital from them, at least at the beginning. As much detached you can be from the final outcome of any shared project, the more protected you are from manipulations that would disappoint you.
You can count on your own resources, but do not depend on the PA person for financial, emotional or companionship issues. If you could get severely hurt if disappointed, this is the weak point where you are going to be hit.
Now, this looks like a lot of work, right? Indeed, it is. But remember, you want to keep your head clear and your self-esteem intact, at the same time entering into one of the most difficult relationships in life: having an intimate relationship with a PA person. Perhaps getting in touch with other people dealing with this challenge could help a lotZZZ

Steve Roberts
123
25 7

Men are dense… in relationships. Men, I know this isn’t going to be a popular statement, but you know that it is true in many ways. We may state that women are not understandable, that they don’t make sense, they are not logical, or that the particular one we’re with is worse than all the others.
But, the truth is, we’re dullards when it comes to the deeper realities of relationships. There are exceptions, but not very many. For instance, my expertise as a marriage and family therapist is relationships. But I can tell you that any woman coming into my office knows more in her little finger innately about relationships than I do.
Women have been raised on them. When they come out of the womb they know that physiologically they are just like momma. So, they try to be even more like her. That’s a relational way to grow up.
Little boys come out of the womb and right away know there is a really big difference between them and momma. And then culture says, “Go out and find yourself. Find out who you really are like.” This sends us toward a non-relational way of growing up.
So, men, let’s face it, we’re playing catch-up with women all the way when it comes to the subtleties of making a good marriage, partnership, or dating relationship. We just don’t “get it” where and when we should.
And here is the rubber meets the road point of this We don’t get it about “fixing” women. We have grown up fixing things. And we also want to fix our mate’s problems because that’s what we think we’re good at.
Unfortunately, women don’t need to be fixed, they need to be listened to, and then they can go fix things just fine themselves. (Men, read that line again!)
The way I get around this with men is that I teach them that “listening is fixing.” It’s simply a matter of redefining what we think fixing is in this context. Remember, “Listening is fixing.”
OK, easy to say, not so easy to do. Here’s how my wife taught me NOT to fix her. One day she started saying to me, “This is not helpful to me.” Note, that this is a very functional “I” statement. No blaming, no finger pointing, and not inflammatory. Just a simple statement about her reality and she left it at that.
What did I do? I immediately started arguing with her, saying that, indeed, this WAS helpful to her. At this point she merely said, “And THIS is not helpful to me,” and turned and walked away. She was very self-composed and non-reactive.
This pattern continued a while (I don’t want to confess how long) until it started to dawn on me that I really did want to be helpful to her, and since I apparently wasn’t being helpful, maybe I ought to ask her what would be. This is where I learned about listening to women!
She taught me that “Listening is fixing!” That’s all she needed, just to be heard, and then she could go on and do whatever she needed herself. She just needed the embrace of the relationship.
I’ve just given you the condensed version. It actually took quite a long time for me to really “get it,” and I still fall into the old pattern, lo, these many years later. Pam merely says, “This is not helpful to me,” and I now catch on fairly quickly. Instead of arguing, I have learned to ask, “What would be more helpful right now?” Then she gets to tell me what she wants or needs from me.
Men, we’re dense, and we’ve got alot to learn.
Women, you already know it, but men are dense and have alot to learn. You can help the process or hinder it, by how you educate the men in your lives. We need to know what you want and need at any given time. My wife’s self-possession, self-restraint and willingness to educate me is an example of how to do so effectively. Just don’t think it works the very first time!

Dr. Robert Huizenga
91
25 7

Should you spy on your cheating husband or wife? You believe you see signs of a cheating spouse. The need to know whether your spouse is cheating and EXACTLY what kind of cheating is taking place is often strong. There are a number of reasons why the drive to spy is powerful. Here are seven:
1. Trust is a big reason, not of your partner, but yourself. Probably for some time you have sensed something is different or questioned the change of behavior in your partner. Perhaps you confronted your cheating husband or cheating wife and it was met with denial. This created a huge dilemma for you because a part of you was screaming, Hey, this doesn’t fit! I don’t believe it! To deny this part of you, which KNOWS the truth, creates a tremendous internal turmoil. If the truth as you suspect it is confirmed, you can take a deep breath and at least know that you can trust yourself. You are NOT CRAZY! Spying is a way to confirm your suspicions and trust more fully your gut feelings.
2. Spying on cheating husbands or cheating wives often helps the person feel connected to the partner who seems to be steadily moving away. It is a way of maintaining contact and having some sort of connection to this stranger who once was well known. Isn’t it like the game of hide-and-seek we used to play as children? Sometimes there, sometimes gone. At least it is a game, and a game is at least some contact, some involvement. You miss the connection and try to find someway to maintain the ties.
3. Spying on a cheating spouse may be an honest attempt to bring resolution to the relationship. You want to know the truth. You sense something does not fit. You suspect there is a breach of something. You want to know what you are up against. You are not willing to stand pat and wait. You are a person of action. You want some sort of movement. You want to get on with the relationship. You want to get on with your life. You know that it is difficult maintaining your sanity when there might be this huge elephant that no one is talking about. You want to know the truth, face the truth, deal with the truth and be free.
4. Cheating husbands or cheating wives often, unfortunately, lead to the demise of marital relationships. If you strongly suspect this to be true for your situation you will want to protect yourself legally. If there is betrayal, lying and deception regarding a third party, other forms of deception may exist financially or in other areas of the relationship. Having “evidence” does have some impact in some court systems. Whether you need to protect yourself legally depends on the kind of affair facing you and the character of your spouse. Please read through my “7 Reasons For an Affair” to determine the situation that faces you. If your spouse is someone who can’t say no, doesn’t want to say no or is acting out rage, please make sure to take protective steps.
5. You may want to protect yourself medically if you suspect you have a cheating husband or wife. You might be concerned about sexually transmitted diseases. Your health may be at stake. And, of course, you need to know. Shame, guilt or self-absorption may be so powerful in your partner that it gets in the way of responsibly informing you of the medical dangers when another partner is sexually brought into your relationship.
6. Seeing signs of a cheating spouse often mean secrets. Secrets are work! There is not much written about the impact of a secret in a relationship, but believe me, in over two decades of working with strained relationships day in and day out, keeping a secret has a powerful impact. It is the proverbial elephant sitting in the room that no one dare talk about. People take extraordinary measures to tip toe around it, but it IS there. Emotionally, you can’t miss it. Secrets are a drain. If the secret persists, its impact is felt in subtle but insidious ways. People become physically ill, sometimes seriously so. People become depressed. People start doing crazy things. Children start acting out, stop achieving, become listless or exhibit a host of other symptoms. Children, or the next generation, often carry the emotional load. You want to spy because you don’t want to live with a secret. You want to discover the truth. You want to feel the freeing power of the exposed secret and the opportunity it offers for healing, resolution, a rich relationship and a productive life.
7. Some of us like drama. Soap opera scenarios and adrenaline based lives are a hallmark of our society. We get juiced or pumped up entering into emotional relational triangles that offer intrigue. Without adrenaline, life seems boring or mundane. Perhaps an unspoken reason for an affair may be to fan the fire? Or, you may spy on your cheating spouse to keep the sense of being alive a part of your life.ZZZ

Song Chengxiang
321
25 7

Have you seen any miracles in your life?
Or maybe I should ask a better question…
Do you believe in miracles?

Give me the answer to either one of the questions, I can tell you your answer for the other.
Dr Wayne Dyer has a wonderful book “You will see it when you believe it”. It is a life changing reading. If you haven’t read it yet, you should get a copy.
I have seen lots of miracles in my own life, and I see miracles almost every day.
Wouldn’t that be a miracle if you are thinking of improving your health, an experienced Chinese Qi Qong master come into your life and become a very good friend and teacher?
Wouldn’t that be a miracle if you are thinking of improving your spiritual life, you suddenly find a book by a spiritual master in the early 20th century.
Wouldn’t that be a miracle if you want to improve your financial life, an retired multi-millionaire living on the other end of the world come to contact you and is willing to teach you his success secrets?
Wouldn’t that be a miracle when you want to do a joint venture, someone from nowhere come to contact you and turn out to make one of the best joint venture?
Wouldn’t that be a miracle when you think of a solution for a problem, and a brilliant idea suddenly hits you?
Miracle happens everywhere, it can happen to you as well.
And the good news is you can deliberately create miracle in your life, and you don’t have to do much work. All it takes is a few new thoughts and awareness. By putting these powerful new thoughts in to your consciousness, you are literally transforming your life.
I am going to write a series of lessons that you can use to create new miracles in your life.
The fist new awareness you need to learn is …
Everything you want is already here:
Einstein had spent years to prove one thing “Time does not exist, it only exist as an illusion in human’s mind”.
If time doesn’t exist, then yesterday is the same as today, and it is the same as tomorrow. Then there is only one time that is now.
If time does not exist, then every thing that possibly exists will be existing here. Imagine you are traveling from point A to point B, but it takes no time because time doesn’t exist. You now can instantly travel from A to B. Then what is the distance between point A and point B. There is no distance; they both exist at the same place and at the same time. There is only one place in the world, and that is here. Think deeply what this really means. Suppose point A is where you are now, and point B is the where you want to be in your imaginary future, or say it your goals, you can now instantly travel from where you are to where you want to be. Yes, I mean INSTANTLY.
Everything that can possibly exist exists here, including the picture you are holding in your mind. If you don’t believe it, ask yourself “where can it be if it is not here?” The answer is nowhere. The things you imagine in your mind is nothing artificial, it is as real as your legs and arms.
Scientists explain the world as a world of possibility, everything in this world exist as a probability. The picture you imagine in your mind exists as a probability that is already in quantum field waiting to take form. The only thing that makes you feel separate from it is the illusion of time. And as you already know, that is just an illusion. In fact, the picture you formed in your mind is already here.
The easiest way to get rid of the illusion of time and bring your pictures into physical form is to simply choose. Choose to see the picture in your reality, and accept it as a fact. That is all that takes. Do you remember how easy you can change a radio station? When you are tired of listening to one station, you can simply change to another one. Life is as simple as that, choose your own picture, and the universe will supply.
Here is something I want you to do after reading this lesson.
Choose one thing you really want, form a picture firmly in your mind, and tell yourself that it is already here, and accept it as a fact. Do this as often as possible and you will get addict to it. See how fast you will create miracles in your liZZZZZ

Nadia Mikkelsen
156
25 7

A way to a woman‘s heart is through flowers. Yes men, it can be that simple. Flowers can represent so many different emotions and it will make your special someone so very happy. It says I love you without having to say it.
Not only are emotions such as sight and smell affected, but it also shows you have a caring side, a softer side.
If you want to show your romantic side, ask your special someone what are her favorite colors, favorite flowers, and favorite plants. And most important, be sure to ask if she has allergies to any type of plant or flower.
A floral arrangement can be made special for your loved one. Visit your local florist for ideas and suggestions. A beautiful floral arrangement can be made with her favorite colors, flowers, and plants. The arrangement can be wrapped in beautiful paper, or arranged in a special vase.
Most large grocery stores are in the floral business. When shopping for that romantic dinner, stop by the floral department. You will find so many different floral arrangements. If you cannot find the perfect arrangement, you can ask the department florist to create something unique for the occasion.
Flowers can also be ordered by the click of a button. Today most people own a computer and have access to the internet. You can shop for ideas and tips before making your final selection. You can shop from the comfort of your own home or office. In fact most flower sales are made on the internet. www.sendflowersfordelivery.com is a good place to find flower shops.
You will find arrangements for all sorts of occasions and price budgets. You will have pictures to choose from along with the price range.
Flowers are not only for romance, but also for making others feel good when it is needed. They can help to raise a person’s spirits when they are down. It has been proven that flowers can help the sick feel well. The colors and smell will heighten emotions in all of us.
Flowers can also make the perfect gift for any holiday. For those that have everything, it can be difficult to find the right gift. Flowers will make any holiday special.
Be sure to ask your florist how to properly care for your arrangement. Flower food is usually included in your arrangement or can be purchased separately. With the proper care, your flowers can look just as beautiful two days later as the day they were purchased.
Today it is becoming more popular for flowers to be purchased for men as well. So men do not be so surprised when you receive flowers from your special someone or even an admirer. It shows that women can be just as romantic as men if not more.
Flowers can also be used to brighten the home or office. Flowers offer so many different fragrances to make your home and office smell and feel fresh. When planning a special party, your florist can create the mood you wish to express to your guests.
In fact it is safe to say that flowers just maybe the world’s most perfect gift.

Julia Tanner
270
25 7

Of course, after you’ve tried a little swinging, you may want to share your amazing experiences with everyone you know. Unfortunately, not everyone will be as open as you. If you work in a conservative environment, or just want to maintain a little anonymity, then there are several ways to go about it.
If you’re going to clubs…
One of the main reasons that a lot of beginning swingers try out clubs is that there is a certain safety in numbers. If you’re there and they’re there, then you both are embracing swinging as a lifestyle or a fascination. And you are both in the same boat of wanting to have a great experience (or experiences) without feeling like your privacy has been invaded. Too much.
Another great aspect of a dark, smoky club is that many of the times; names are not exchanged, so you can have a wonderful time without even knowing who you were with. This might sound impersonal, but it’s a safety feature that’s built in. You might find that being anonymous is highly erotic and satisfying when you’re in the club situation. And you also won’t worry about running into anyone later with an awkward silence about who knows who.
Maybe you’ll see someone at the local grocery store. Just nod, smile, and keep moving to the milk section. Keep your name for a while until you feel that there’s a special connection between you and another couple or person. You want to take your time to feel trust and security within your swinging group. And if you find someone that you like?
Meeting with another couple in a public place at first will help you determine if you’re all ready to trust each other. Meet in a non-sexual environment to see how you interact before you jump into bed (or other places) with each other.
When you’re online…
With swinging dating services now available at the touch of a keyboard, you are launched into the faceless world of online dating. But this can be a great start for a new swinger. Not only can you choose whether or not to reveal your name and picture, but you can also take your time in determining if a person is right for you. You can ask questions over the secure servers available, or email anonymously.
Using one of those free email accounts is best. Keep this playtime separate.
And if you’re not sure about a person, it’s a lot easier to cut it off before you would ever meet. There are also safety monitors on many of the swingers dating sites, so if you feel that someone is being menacing or just plain creepy-report them. You could be saving someone else some trouble.
A final note…
Unfortunately, not everyone understands the joys of swinging, or they only want to live out their fantasies, but dismiss yours. Stalkers are a very real problem, so protecting your personal information until you are absolutely sure about someone is important.
Don’t give out your name, where you work, where you live, or any other identifiable informationZZZ

Cenk Butunley
325
25 7

After days or months of unsuccessful approaches in bars, pubs, you have decided to search for the love not in the wrong places and decided to look for the one in online dating so you’re one step closer to success by deciding that anyway.
There are 3 important factors in online dating that can instantly lead you to success rather than another failure.
- A solid and stunning personal ad.
- A genuine picture with a warm smile of yours.
-Writing effective emails to your matches.
But, here we’ll discuss how to write a personal ad, that could make a difference:
- Always, reveal your age correctly from the start as honesty and trust is the most important factor for a successful online dating relationship.
- Describe yourself accurately. Doesnt matter what it is the question(height, weight, religion, etc..), give accurate answers.
- Dont try to draw a perfect profile as nobody wants a perfect date but a genuine date.
- Be clear about why are you there, what you’re looking for in that dating site.
- Dont go into to much detail what kind of match you’re looking for too early as you dont want to eliminate matches so early in the game.
- In your words, try to show your optimistic view of life, sound optimistic in your ad.
- Don’t stuff your ad with lots of words or a long history of yourself. Remember, you’re not writing a boring CV for a job interview, you’re trying to get the attention of your potential dates. So leave spaces when neccessary.
- Show your sense of humour with making a joke about yourself.
- If you have writing skills. Try to write your personal ad like an adventure novel(Dan Brown style if possible) which the other side cannot get enough off but dont finish the story so soon. Leave a page for questions.
- Leave a question mark about yourself and on the other side, be honest, accurate, funny, serious and most important of all mysterious.
- Finally, check for your grammar or any other errors before you complete your ad.
It’s been researched and proven that in the new millenium, matching success rates are hundred times more in online dating than offline dating. But that does not mean that you’ll be successful nevertheless. Everything good in life needs a bit effort and work. So if you really want to find your other half and build a serious relationship you must care for the candidates and put together a good profile with a shining personal ad and a picture. You care for your potential matches and they will take care of you.

Amy Lee Johnson
249
25 7

If your wedding is on a tight budget then you need to take a look at cheap wedding gowns. Not everyone has the money to buy designer wedding gowns, but that doesn’t mean you can’t look stunning. Many cheap wedding gowns still have the look of elegance.
With the invention of the internet, finding cheap wedding gowns are so incredibly easy. You can sit right in front of your computer in your PJs and browse through hundreds of different gowns. And when I say cheap, I mean you can get a very high quality wedding gown for under three hundred dollars.
Sure, it won’t be the quality of say Vera Wang wedding gowns, but for the price you just can’t go wrong. Saving money on your wedding gown also opens opportunities to spend more money in other places of your wedding such as the wedding rings or honeymoon. Because, really, how many times will you be wearing your wedding gown? Wouldn’t you much rather spend your hard earned money on something that will last longer than one day?
Like every other aspect of the wedding, you need to plan ahead 4-6 months when ordering your gown. You need to make sure that you get the gown in time and that everything fits properly. If there are mistakes, you want to leave yourself time to be able to get these fixed.

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Lu Huskey
251
25 7

The phone rings at 3:00 Monday afternoon and it is your best girlfriend Jenny, inviting you to dinner next weekend. What a nice thought, until she tells you there is “this guy she just knows you’ll like”.
Do these “arranged situations” ever work out; these blind dates that well meaning friends and families attempt to arrange for all of us at some point in our lives? What do we have to lose anyway? Well, let’s just look at what happened when Jenny tried to do this favor for her friend Lisa!
It had been a long Monday for Lisa, and she was ready for a friendly voice on the telephone. When she heard from Jenny, it was the bright spot in her day. Little did Lisa know what an impact this call would have on her life for the next few weeks. Jenny invited her to a restaurant they had both been anxious to try out; a new little Italian place with red checked tablecloths, a real live violinist, and a tempting selection of wonderful foods and wines. This was just what she was needed to plan for to help her get through her week!
But wait, there’s a catch, and he has a name. Jenny knows this fellow named Bob who just moved to town and is a really nice guy. She thought it would be “fun” to do a double date Saturday night with Bob and his friend from work. It sounded harmless since they’ve both wanted to try out the new place, so Lisa accepted Jenny’s invitation and they both made plans to meet at Berelli’s Saturday night.
So far, these girls are doing the right thing by meeting these guys at the restaurant and not being picked up. They don’t know them very well and if for some reason, one (or both) need to duck out, neither will be stuck without wheels.
The weekend rolled around soon enough and Jenny and Lisa had taken a little trip the mall to shop for a couple of cute dresses and matching shoes. They helped each other with their hair that Saturday afternoon, and almost felt like young schoolgirls going out on their first date. In a way it was, for Lisa, since it was her first blind date. She had never done anything like this before, and although she was looking forward to being with her friend, she was a little hesitant about meeting this guy Bob. Anyway, it was just a dinner and that would be it.
They jumped into the car and drove over to Berelli’s, making sure they were “fashionably” late (but just 10 minutes), not to appear over anxious to their gentleman waiting. Bob and William had already gotten a nice table and ordered a bottle of wine, so the scene was set for a lovely evening. What a cute place this new little restaurant was! It looked like a page right out of Italy, with the tables set so beautifully, music filling the room, and Jenny even noticed a quaint little dance floor near the violinist for those who wished to become a little romantic. This was just what she needed, and Bob looked pretty good too. He had a nice smile, good looking suit, and pulled out her chair for her when she sat down. This man is right out of a storybook! Who ever said blind dates are a mistake anyway?
As the evening progressed, the couples seemed to enjoy each other’s company and all four were convinced Berelli’s was a dining experience that they would recommend to their other friends. Lisa was so glad that she decided to take Jenny up on her offer. Actually she had never tried blind dating until that night because of all the horror stories told in the past. She had heard tales of all sorts, and although they were true, perhaps they were exaggerated a bit. They planned another date the next weekend and Jenny hoped that her first blind date would be her last. Bob very well just may be the “Mr. Right” she had been waiting for.
Now that is the way a story should always go, with a happy ending; however, girls (and guys) beware of the blind date. Make sure you handle yourself in a manner that doesn’t allow yourself to be taken advantage of in any way, especially with wine flowing freely all night long. Many times if you have “let your guard down” you can find yourself in a situation you may not be able to handle. For example, if you are really attracted to someone and let him know it, he can sometimes get the wrong impression. It just is always a good idea not to be too friendly on first dates (and sometimes second and third dates) until you really get to know the person and you are certain he respects your wishes.
When employers hire new people, they many times do reference checks, and sometimes even background checks before they hire. You can do the same type of thing by making sure someone knows this person you plan to go out with and hopefully knows something about his past. The last thing you want is to fall in love with some guy or gal who ends up with the reputation of violence or some other seedy problem. These kinds of situations happen all the time. “But they would never happen to me…” we all believe; but they can, so we much be smart about where we go and with whom we go out with.
Lisa got lucky and met the man of her dreams, but unfortunately, that isn’t always the way it works. Thinking back to her story, she originally just planned to have a nice evening and things just happened to work out much better than she expected. Meeting new people is fun; just be sure and use good common sense and keep a safe distance until you know exactly what you are getting

Ken Katz
41
25 7

Internet dating can be great fun for you. It is an easy and painless way to meet some great people you might not normally meet. It seems that today people are working much more than in the past. When you are ready to go home, you are too tired to go out everynight looking to meet someone.
This is where internet dating excels. After a long hard day of work, you can go home, get into some comfortable clothes, make a fast dinner. Or if you where lucky to stop by and pick up a pre-cocked meal (OK, fast food!) you can just crash by the computer, maybe answer some email and then go looking for dates the easy way!
Go to your favorite seach engine and do a search for internet dating, online dating, internet dating sites, online dating sites, dating sites, gay, bi, Christian dating, Jewish dating or any phrase you think is good. Whatever you are looking for, chances are there is a internet dating site catering to your interests.
Jot down a few of the sites that you like and visit each one. If you are new to internet dating, pick at least five sites.
Go to each date site and check out the site. Search the profiles and try to find a few people you might want to contact. If anyone really peaks your interest, find their user name or “handle” and write it down besides that site name on your list.
If the site has a forum or a chat room that you can check out, by all means log on and maybe talk to some of the members. See if they have similar interests as you and if you think that they might be fun to talk to in the future.
If price is a factor, look at the sites fees. See what they charge for for the services you are interested in. Most sites today, allow you to add a free profile to their database.
Usually if you want to contact a profile, will you have to register and pay a monthly fee. Don’t be alarmed at the fees. If you think about it,the fees are probably still cheaper and much easier to bear then going out on dates that are no fun. So, don’t be turned off by fees. The sites today have all levels of fees. If you are inteested in meeting only one or two of the profiles you like, you can take out a one day subscription that is very reasonable.
But, really go through five or more sites, to get a feeling of what is out there. Once you have visited a few sites you will know which ones you liked and are inerested in adding your profile. Remember, the more sites you have a profile on the better are your chances of finding the right dating partner faster.
When adding your profile, take time to really think about your answers, check your spelling and be honest. This way you will show the best side of yourself and will have nothing to fear in the future if your relationship advances. It is hard to have to explain away the little white lies we all try to tell when we first meet someone. Honesty is the best policy and leads to less headaches.
Remember, online dating should be fun. So, check out the sites with that attitude and your email box will be full of people wanting to meet and learn more about you.

Amy Spade
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In order to have even more time to socialize or to give the married couple some time for pictures or quiet, the trend of cocktail hours has re-emerged. Of course, these aren’t the only reasons that you may want to contemplate a little fun before the actual start of the reception.
For the wedding party
After the rush of pictures and the excitement of the ceremony, a lot of the wedding party can become disheveled and unkempt. By giving them a little time to get freshened up, all of the reception pictures can be just as lovely as the ceremony ones.
Of course, if the wedding party has to transport themselves to the reception hall, a cocktail hour can give them enough time to get there and get organized as well. They can put away anything that they brought with them to the hotel or to the ceremony, plus change into anything that they may have brought with them-more comfortable shoes, for example.
A cocktail hour is a great new way to have a receiving line. The wedding party can meet and greet the guests as they arrive at the reception hall, even show them to their seats if they’d like. This way, the only thing that anyone is waiting on is the bride and groom.
For out of town guests
If you just couldn’t schedule the wedding and the reception back to back, then you may be in luck with having a cocktail hour. When your guests are from out of town, they don’t necessarily want to go back to their hotels before heading over for the reception, so they can have the option of going for light appetizers and cocktails.
This also gives them the opportunity to mingle with everyone in a less intense setting. There won’t be all the dancing and cake cutting, so it can be a lot calmer. Plus if the wedding was earlier, the guests are probably hungry, so you’ll be feeding them as well. And drinks can help to liven up any bunch of people.
A cocktail hour is a great way to warm everyone up and get acquainted before the arrival of the couple and the start of the reception. And since you’re feeding everyone a little something to begin with, you may also be able to have a less complicated dinner menu-if you’re on a budget.
So if you’re deciding on whether or not to have a cocktail hour, why not just do it? It’s an inexpensive way to keep your guests from having grumbling stomachs.

Dr. Robert Huizenga
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Hearing that your cheating spouse is “in love” with someone else is devastating. I hear often, “I can handle her having sex with someone else. I think I can live with that. But, for her to give herself emotionally and “love” someone else…man, that is hard.” (Feel free to substitute the word he for she in this article.)
What can you specifically do to increase the odds of saving the marriage?
So often the offended spouse reacts with intense feelings and pulls out all stops to “win her back.”
He applies pressure. Begs. Cajoles. Makes promises. Gets in her face. Sends flowers. Arranges for dates. Talks to her family and friends. Calls her on the phone. Asks questions… daily, sometimes hourly. He is on her like a fly on doo-doo.
It doesn’t work.Why? Well, for one reason she has found all the stimulation and excitement she supposedly needs in her new found “love.”
At a deeper level this is confusing enough for the cheating husband or cheating wife. Any additional input will be overwhelming and she is liable to close the door on the marriage even further. Plus, she is really looking for some stability, some solid centered core that will hold her firm when the wind of drama entices her and blows around her.
If you bombard her with your neediness, you are certainly not the person who can help her in ways she really seeks.
She also is liable to create a polarity and begin comparing you to him. With your neediness dripping all over you, you don’t stand a very good chance of coming out on top. Sorry!
Here’s a tactic that helps solve the dilemma and gives you a greater chance of saving the marriage.It’s called “back off!”
Stop pressing. Slow down the pace. Be silent – most of the time. Stop making requests. Stop asking questions. Stop trying to wiggle out some assurance. Stop being a pain!
Remember, this “in love” state will fade. You need to have the confidence that it will. You need patience. The relationship will run its course.
She needs the space. She needs some quiet moments to truly hear herself and face the emptiness within. There will be a voice within her that says, “This will not last. Is this what I really want? At some time I must live in the real world. Where is this taking me? Is this where I really want to go? Why am I so dependent on him? Why do I feel this empty pit in my stomach when I’m not with him? What does this say about me?”
This is her opportunity to learn about TRUE love. Don’t get in her way.
I know. I know. This is easier said than done. But, you must do it. It is vitally important that you learn to quiet yourself, control yourself and keep on the straight and narrow path.
At this point with those I coach, I teach them a skill called “charging neutral” to help “back off.” Use that skill.This will take some effort. It might take some coaching or therapy. It most likely will demand that you get to know yourself better, that you gain more confidence in you – apart from what she does with him – that you build a strong foundation under yourself that can weather any storm.
This is your opportunity to grow to another level.
Oh, by the way. She will notice! And….she might like it.
Backing off does not mean that you don’t have anything to do with her. Quite the contrary. You want to maintain your contact with her, but it will be QUALITY contact. It will be contact that does honor to you, confronts her with the reality of her decisions and works toward resolution for the marriage.
Summary: Less often means more when facing emotional infidelity. Learning a specific skill such as “backing off” enhances one’s chance to save thiage.

Dr. Robert Huizenga
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When you spy on your suspected cheating spouse, please make sure you consider all the possibilities you might encounter and whether you can handle them.
Have you considered the many situations that spying might uncover? Can you imagine the worst thing you might find? Predict what your response will be to the worst-case scenario. Are you ready? Here are some specific questions to ask:
1) Do I have friends I can count on for support if I discover the worst? Do they know I might need them? Have I told them exactly how they might help me? Do I have the capacity to stand back from the deep emotions and not get mired or lost in destructive thoughts and feelings?
2) How have I handled emotional pain in the past? What if it gets almost unbearable? If I encounter the worst possible emotional hurt and pain, do I have a therapist I can contact immediately and see soon to help me through the rough spots?
3) You see the signs of a cheating spouse. What will be my strategy for what I find? Do I have a strategy for the different scenarios? Do I have a strategy to confront or not confront my spouse? How, when and under what circumstances will I confront him/her?
4) What kind of strategy will I have for self-care? What will I need to do to keep myself functioning somewhat effectively?
5) Do I have a coach or an objective someone who knows about cheating husbands and cheating wives and who can help me develop strategies and goals for confrontation and self-care? Someone to keep me focused and working on these strategies and goals?
6) Do I know what kind of affair I might face? Do I know the prognosis for that kind of affair? Have I educated myself about affairs and what I must do to effectively resolve and move through this crisis?